Big Apple Dating Blues


New York City has fine men but searching for a relationship there is like hunting for Fool's Gold.

Last weekend “Van” and I drove up to Crown Heights, Brooklyn to attend a buddy’s 40th birthday.

And there were fine men everywhere.

Dominican men.

Puerto Rican men.

Black men.

Korean men.

White men.

Jamaican men.

Nigerian men.

Hassidic men (yep, those beards, wide brimmed hats and side locks do something for me).

So why come when I get to the rooftop party with the great view of the Brooklyn and Manhattan skylines and start talking to gay men about the dating scene they say it sucks?

“Abram,” a guy who moved to NYC from Baltimore in the 90s, said the main problem is there are too many men.

The variety is staggering.

“So everybody is afraid to settle down because they think a man that is hotter and more their type is just around the corner,” he said.

“But there is no perfect man,” I answer.

“I know, right,” Abram replied.

Even some of the “straight” men are suspect. Van and I went past a corner restaurant and a cute black guy and his girl were having lunch.

Do you know the man locked eyes with me and didn’t break the stare as I rounded the block?

I knew what that look meant.

The other problem is that it is soooo easy to hook up in the five burroughs, folks we met said.

New York City is a 24-hour town and the sex is around the clock.

I logged onto to Adam4Adam and quickly got 15 messages in my inbox from guys of every flavor you could imagine.

Two friends of ours, one who lives in New Jersey, invited us to this huge Nubian sex party on West 38th in Manhattan but we weren’t in the city to play and didn’t attend.

So I learned that just because you are around a million gay men in a huge metropolis doesn’t mean you will find Mr. Right.

But you sure can fuck as
much as you want until Mr. Right comes along.