That only happens in porn. Right?


I was riding home on the commuter train Wednesday when my phone buzzed. It was my buddy “Hiram.”

Hiram is a retired professional who owns a tastefully decorated condo on the north side of Baltimore. Light skinned with a distinguished air, he stays in the gym and has a great body for a man nearing 60.

We usually talk only every few weeks so I was wondering why he was calling me in the middle of rush hour.

“Immanuel, you won’t guess what happened,” he said excitedly.

“Nah, Hi what’s going on? Are you okay?”

“You have got to hear about this,” he said, chuckling.

“Okay, man wassup? Nobody is around me so I can talk.”

With winter over and air conditioning season coming Hiram arranged to get the air ducts in his place cleaned. He used an contractor referred by one of his friends.

The doorbell rang and Hiram opened the door and this handsome, black middle aged man walked in.

“He looked like he worked out every day. I mean he had muscles and a tight ass.”

Hiram let him in and the contractor examined the ducts before giving an estimate. Hiram, who is verse with a nice 8-inch schlong, couldn’t help looking at the man’s bubble ass in his jeans as he stretched to check a vent running near the ceiling.

The guy must have noticed. He turned around and grinned at Hiram.

“Well, how much is this job going to cost me?”

“Well sir, my rate is usually $10 a foot. But you can pay me back any way you want.”

And he looked Hiram’s trim body up and down appreciatively and then looked up and into Hiram’s eyes with a stare that screamed lust.

You know what happened next. They ended up in Hiram’s bed 69’ing, jacking each other’s dicks and tongue kissing deeply. Then they busted a good nutt and the contractor washed up.

This guy repaired my furnace last year. He was so fine -- dark chocolate, full lips and a bubble ass -- that I had to take his pic on the sly. He lingered and talked long after the job was done and we even exchanged numbers. I was tempted to hit on him but didn't.

This guy repaired my furnace last year. He was so fine — dark chocolate, full lips and a bubble ass — that I had to take his pic on the sly. He lingered and talked long after the job was done and we even exchanged numbers. I was tempted to hit on him but didn’t.

Hiram noticed he had a wedding band on his hand but said nothing.

Hiram ended up not only getting a great Wednesday afternoon quickie but the contractor cleaned his ducts for free. They have made a date to meet again, I think on Monday.

“Man, I have only heard about that happening in porno movies,” I said. “I mean, I’ve had repairmen come over who were hot but I would never proposition them.”

“I know, right,” Hiram answered. “One time this sloppy white plumber came over and tried to hit on me but I acted like I didn’t hear him.”

“Wow, I wonder how much stuff like this happens,” I said.

“Probably a lot.”

“Well, man I’m happy for you and hope you have fun when he comes back. Tell me all about it.”

“Okay Immanuel, have a nice evening. I just had to tell you right away.”

“Bye Hi! That incident couldn’t have happened to a better person. Happy for you man.”

8 thoughts on “That only happens in porn. Right?

  1. I’d seduce a couple of workmen during my college days…from heavy-chested hot security guardmen…sexy gardeners…to chauffeurs!! Both the singles and married!! I have always believed that I could have any man I wanted -and I did!!

  2. Immanuel, man, you have made my morning!! Who would have thought that this stuff happens in real life?? Maybe you need to hookup with your furnace repairman and see if you can “stoke” that “furnace”…….

      • Haha…just make sure you send out enough vibe with your body-lauguage and if he is receptive, then look in straight in the face and say: I DID LIKE TO SUCK YOUR DICK!! Most guys are intrigued by dick-sucking! He might just respond: Go for it!! Take it from me…I know the ropes haha

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