When Morgan and I were on the Christmas cruise we attended a meeting of “Friends of Dorothy,” a reception given on cruises so LGBT people can meet and greet.
There were about a dozen people gathered around the bar, mostly male couples. One really nice guy was on the cruise with his parents, sister and brother-in-law and their kids and wanted to briefly escape from the straight relatives and let his hair down among gay folks.
We stood around with drinks and chatted, exchanging tips about what shore excursions to go on and what were the best gay-friendly cruises and vacation packages to book.
Morgan and I were the only African American couple there.
One of the white guys who was part of a couple started flirting with me a bit. And then just out of the blue he said with a glint in his eye, “You know when I have a few drinks I will do just about anything.” And he eyed my crotch .
It was kind of embarassing. The man was very nice and could carry on a good conversation but was not my type. He was an aging twink — at one time he was probably really cute but he dressed too young and acted to coquettishly for his age.
I glanced over at Morgan. He did not look amused either. The white guy and his partner got the message — we weren’t interested in a foursome — and there was an awkward silence.
“I guess we will catch up you guys later on the cruise,” I finally said. “We are going to go try to catch a comedy show now.”
And Morgan and I headed off for the comedy club at the stern of the boat. For the rest of the cruise I saw this couple and even worked out in the gym next to them but they didn’t acknowledge me or even say hello.
Morgan and I talked about it later. About how white gay guys sometimes take it for granted that because they are white they automatically have the right to have sex with us. And get mad and bitchy when we don’t respond.
Don’t get me wrong. There are many nice white guys and Morgan and I know know interracial couples who are in healthy relationships. But I remember the days when I was trolling Adam4Adam and white guys would hit me up. No matter how out of shape or unattractive they were they assumed my dick was there to fuck their asses silly. Oftentimes they wouldn’t even say hello or ask my name.
“I want some of that black cock.”
“I’m free this afternoon after work. Come over and give me some of that python.”
“I love black dick. When can you come over?”
And check out Craigslist sometimes. There are black guys who prefer white men and advertise for that. But they are outnumbered five-to-one by white men seeking “big black cocks” to come over and use their holes like pussies. Oh, and bring all your black buddies along with you to hit some of this white ass if they want.
This subtle racism, this objectification of black gay men’s bodies, is reflected in porn. How many movies are there where some white twink is gangbanged by black “thugs” or some old white man gets served by a big black dick? Shoot, the horse-hung black porn star Castro, who is also known by the name Supreme, now seems to do no movies other than fucking mostly average looking white dudes on porn Websites such as “It’s Gonna Hurt.”
Meanwhile the rest of black porn is dominated by “thug” movies. Is that all the larger gay society thinks black men are — “thugs” and “Mandingos” put on this earth to fit their narrow definition of what they think a black gay man is?