Slow Down



One of my best buddies “Andre” sends me an email. “I need to talk to you. I’m worried.”

“Uh oh,” I think, feeling like a little kid caught pissing in the neighbor’s garden. “What did I do?”

I respect Andre. His advice is always sound. He was married to a woman at one time. After that relationship ended he transitioned into the gay world. He has buried two long-term lovers and at times struggled financially.

But he always keeps going and is one of the warmest people I know. His door is always open and you know you can go there to land a decent meal, good conversation, great sex, or just have an ear to listen to.

Andre read the blog about crazy “Evan” and it concerned him.

“You really need to slow down and be careful. I don’t want to read about you in the newspaper.”

I bristle a bit inside but I tell myself shut up and listen and learn. Andre has been in the gay world a lot longer.

“And you need to limit these sex parties. If you get a reputation for going to them people can talk about you. And some of these queens can be vicious. You just haven’t seen that yet.”

“Look, I’m going to take you to some events where there is not sex so you can meet some gays who are doing some positive things.”

“And don’t put so much information in your blog about what you do. People can use that against you, too. And you should really consider forming a support group to help other guys like you. You know, you don’t how you could help somebody else.”

“Hey Andre, I appreciate that. I’ll listen to what you say,” I respond. And I plan to.

Okay, from what I read when guys come out they get real promiscuous because the gay life is new and they want to bust loose and express themselves. But later you get acculturated and tone the sex down, going more for quality than quantity.

Other buddies “in the family” tell me Andre’s advice is sound. My good buddy “Rex” said I could meet a crazy hookup who is mad I don’t want to sex them any more. That person could spread vicious gossip about me.

Wow, this gay culture is more complex than I thought. There are land mines out there. I feel like a babe in the woods sometimes.

I’ve Been Nominated for Best Gay Adult Blog!



I got an email informing me that my blog has been nominated the Best Gay Blog of 2009 in the Adult Category. Go here to read about the nominees and vote for them.

Even if I don’t win I am honored. I wrote this blog to process my thoughts, work through some issues, and to educate and titillate you at the same time.

In the past month alone, my blog has attracted almost 1,000 readers from 52 nations, including India, Saudi Arabia, Sweden and Brazil. Blog experts I know said that is a pretty respectable readership for a personal blog.

Thank you all for your support and encouraging comments.

More Than He Can Chew


This is my dick. I’m not trying to brag but it is big. Not the biggest, but a lot of times hookups are surprised by its size. And they want me back for more.

The only problem is sometimes they bite off more than they can chew. Here’s yet another example.

I hooked up earlier this week with “Bo,” a big, light-skinned businessman from the South who lives not that far from me. Bo has big muscles and good sized thick dick, but when I walked into the door it was all about me fucking him.

His nipples are pink and stand out and I got him heated by sucking and nibbling on them. We fucked at a furious pace but had to stop because the condom popped and he didnt have any more.

“Come back later in the week and we can finish that up,” he said.

So Thursday night we did but a repeat performance but it turned out to be a miserable experience. I really should have known better. I broke several of my hookup rules – the main one being don’t let anyone obligate your time. So I have nobody to blame but myself and my hard dick that wanted to plunge into Bo’s red muscle ass one more time.

I was at a seminar last evening when Bo called.

“I’m only a few minutes drive from you and I’ll call when this over. It’s only supposed to last another 30 minutes.”

But when I call Bo later there was no answer and his voicemail box was full so I just went back home and chilled. No sooner than I get settled than my cellphone starts buzzing.

Where are you,” Bo asks.

I’m back home. I called you and you weren’t in.”

Oh, I was outside talking to my neighbor while she hung up Christmas decorations and I didnt hear the phone. Hey, come on over.”

Against my better judgment I head out. But when I get there the townhouse is dark. I ring the doorbell. Wait. I ring the doorbell again. And wait some more. Five minutes pass and no Bo. So I walk back to my car and hop in, ready to go home.

I’m just pulling out of his complex when my cellphone buzzes.

Where did you go,” Bo asks.

Look man, let me make something clear if we are going to continue to hook up. I don’t like standing outside in the cold looking like a burglar waiting on you to come down. You knew I was coming a half hour ago.”

“Oh, come on. Come back.”

So like a stupid ass I go back. I go upstairs and take a shower and come out all fresh with my dick sticking up.

But no Bo. I hear him taking a shower in the other bathroom down the hall.

Now, he knew I was coming like more than an hour ago,” I think to myself. “You would have thought dude got himself clean.”

Bo finally comes out and hops in bed. But then he said he has to make a call to his boss about a business deal. So there he is on the phone, gabbing about loans, and buy-out deals and finances and government contracts and bids while I lay in his bed jerking my dick to keep it warm and hard.

Plus he has some home decorating show playing on the television because, you know, he’s one of those gay guys who watches nothing but that shit. Well, I’m gay too but hell turn to some Thursday night football!

Finally he is free.

He doesn’t give much foreplay…he is about getting banged. And bang him I do, standing by the bed while he kneels doggy style on the mattress and lets me fuck him from the back.

Go slow, you got to ease that in. You got a big dick man.”

Oooh, that feels good. Gotdamm! That’s some good dick. Oooh. Play with my nipples while you fuck me.”

I bang him for like a minute and he pops up. “I got to go to the bathroom.”

Then I fuck him some more and he pops up again. “Damn, it’s been awhile since I fucked. I got to go the bathroom again.”

He goes back in the bathroom, leaving me laying in bed. I’m beginning to think this guy has Jack-in-the-Box DNA in his genes he jumps up and down so much. But this time I hear the water in the bathroom running a long time. Then things go silent.

I swear 20 minutes have elapsed. I’m tired and got to get up early for work. So I dress and head out. I knock on the bathroom door on the way out.

Hey Bo, I’m tired. I’m heading out.”

What? I’m getting ready to go some more.”

Sorry man, I’m tired.”

Oh, okay, I’ll call you later.But Bo didn’t call that night and I don’t plan to go back.

Q: Okay bottoms out there, answer this question. What the fuck was up with Bo?