There are a lot more Jason Collins out there

Jason Collins. Magazine cover courtesy of Sports Illustrated.

I’m elated NBA free agent Jason Collins has come out publicly as gay.

Finally there is another gay role model out there who is black, successful, athletic, and has already succeeded in the competitive world of sports. If he never gets picked up by another team he has proved gay men can jump.

The reaction has been largely positive — even President Obama and the First Lady have congratulated Collins.

But not surprisingly it is members of Collins’ own race who have been the most assholish and homophobic — including ESPN’s Chris Broussard (read the Maybe it’s just me blog for the details) and Mike Wallace of the Miami Dolphins (read the Inside Jamari Fox blog for more on that).

For all these folks throwing hate, get over it. God made some folks gay and others not. And there are a lot of gay athletes in professional sports.

How do I know? Some of my friends are hooking up with them.

Just last weekend a platonic friend from Washington, D.C., “Vaughn,” came up to spend some time with me in Baltimore and check out the gay life here.

Before we hit Buns nightclub to catch some good house music Vaughn, a brown-skinned, 40-something Daddy from Kentucky with a handsome face, bulging biceps, and country accent, told me he had a secret to tell.

“Immanuel, a few months ago a young guy who I hook up with regular said he had a bottom buddy who wanted to threesome so I said okay.”

Like me Vaughn is a divorced man with kids who has come out relatively recently. So I know he is still sowing his wild oats.

“Okay Vaughn what’s so unusual about a threesome?”

“Listen, I’m going to get to that,” Vaughn said, grinning slyly.

“When I got there another young dark-skinned guy was already waiting,” he continued. “He wasn’t that nice looking — in fact he looked kinda weird and had on these baggy sweats.”

“But when he took off his clothes — damn! It was all muscles and he had a fat bubble butt and a huge dick.”

“His friend fucked him, and then I fucked him, and we took turns. Man, he had some good ass. Tight and wet.”

“Okay, Vaughn, I’m glad you enjoyed yourself and got some good ass,” I said. “I know you prefer those young boys.”

“Well, Immanuel, the bottom guy left about the same time I did and he pulled up his car next to me at a stoplight and looked over me like he wanted to talk some more but I had things to do so I drove on.”

“Do you know a couple of days later I was watching the Washington Redskins play Philadelphia and there he was on the sidelines! It was the same guy! I got his jersey number and Googled just to make sure.”

“I called my regular back and he confirmed who it was. He said he arranges dick for him.”

I smiled and joked with Vaughn that he should have gotten the player’s number because dude really is kinda hot. But the story wasn’t really so surprising. I have heard similar ones.

For instance, a Jamaican guy I know goes to very private sex parties in the Maryland suburbs of D.C. thrown by this former football player. Guy won’t say who it is but I believe his story because he is very discreet and not one to gossip.

Another buddy of mine about 10 years ago dated a married NFL football player, who loved to play golf. They would go on golfing trips together as a cover but believe me a golf ball wasn’t the only thing getting pushed into holes.

My buddy met this football player at a golf resort in Florida one weekend, they went up to the hotel room, and fucked liked rabbits (they are both verse). Then they got a case of the post-fuck munchies and went out to eat.

It was a good thing they did. The football player’s wife showed up unexpectedly at the front desk and staff called the baller to let him know she was in the area and requesting room access.

The football player was able to spirit my buddy and his luggage to another room, regain his composure, and send his wife to get a massage or something until he could clean up the evidence and arrange to meet her later.

I can imagine this is what Mr. Football said to the Missus.

“Hey baby, what a surprise you are here. Where was I? Well me and the boys were out on the links all day. But hey, now that you are here let’s make this a romantic weekend. Where you want to have dinner?”

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Immanuel’s Gay Horoscope Guide

You may not know this but I’ve been an astrology fan since junior high school. I really think there is some truth in this ancient art.

I’ve also dealt with a lot of men of all astrological signs. So I decided to write my own gay astrological guide.

This guide focuses on Sun Signs, which are how you present yourselves to the outside world.

Remember, everyone is a mixture of signs. For instance you might be a Aries with Libra Rising and a Moon in Cancer, which would make you more sensitive than the stereotypical hot-headed Aries.

Here’s my guide:

ARIES (March 21 to April 21)

Good points: Men born under the sign of the ram are natural-born leaders. They are usually active, confident, love to socialize, and even if they are short statured seem to be taller than they are. People who are born under the sign of Aries or having Aries in their chart, for instance as a rising sign, are also highly sexed. So to keep one be a good conversationalist and try to keep sex fun and varied (Some Aries love role-playing and threesomes).

Bad points: Gay Aries men can have a short attention span, so may come across as insensitive. This short attention span also makes them more likely to come on strong at the beginning of a relationship and then disappear, leaving you wondering “What the fuck just happened here?” Although they come across as confident their egos can be quite fragile and they need a lot of stroking, which can be tedious to friends and partners. And watch out because this sign can be possessive.

Aries Celebrity: Eddie Murphy

TAURUS (April 22-May 21)

Good points: Taurus men are strong, self-assured and confident. They are not complicated people and are always the level-headed one in the bunch. Need good advice? Go to a Taurus, they won’t steer you wrong. Need a true friend? A Taurus is your man. They have good healthy attitudes toward sex and are usually good at it. You want to spice up your bedroom game? Go see a Taurus for advice.

Bad Points: Taurus men love luxury and fine things,which can lead them to overextend themselves financially. They are also stubborn — once they make up their minds about something that is usually it so don’t try arguing. Also, do not embarrass them or take their quietness for being a pushover. You could end up with a bull’s horns up your ass and believe me the experience will not be pleasurable.

Taurus Celebrity: Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson

GEMINI (May 22-June 21)

Good Points: Geminis are the communicators of the Zodiac. This is the gay man you want around when you want good conversation, the latest gossip, and what’s the latest in news and fashion. Gay Gemini men talk alot and even when they are older have an air of youth about them. Sexually Geminis are game — they are imaginative and giving lovers who will try anything once and tell you all about it.

Bad Points: Geminis, especially younger ones who haven’t calmed down, can be moody bitches. Which twin is showing up today? Think you have that Gemini man tied down? Think again. They can be very unemotional. When a Gemini is bored with you they will take off and not look back.

Gemini Celebrity: Maxwell

CANCER (June 22-July 21)

Good Points: Cancer men are good at relationships. They are eternal romantics and although they may play around they really want just one. If you love a Cancer man you better be about family and creating a good home. They are about stability. They are also sensitive and don’t like a lot of drama. Cancer men are also amazing lovers who know how to take their time and please a partner.

Bad Points: Cancer men can be clingy and insecure. Still waters also run deep — they are sensitive and emotional but may hide it from their partners or have problems communicating their wants and needs. This can frustrate loved ones.

Cancer Celebrity: Danny Glover

LEO (August 22-September 21)

Good points: You better be rested to keep up with a Leo. They are fun-loving and social and enjoy having a large circle of friends and associates. They are generous with their time and attention and make great companions and lovers, as long as you let them take the lead because like lions they are the King of the Jungle. They have also ferocious sexual appetites so be ready to be eaten alive!

Bad points: Their larger-than-life egos can be irritating. Leos can sometimes paint the picture that they are successful but don’t have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of. Also, when in a relationship with a gay Leo man be prepared to be in an unequal relationship. In their minds they are running things and you are the sidekick.

Leo Celebrity: Wesley Snipes

VIRGO (September 22-October 21)

Good Points: Detailed, meticulous, good dressers and good conversationalists. Gay Virgo men are usually successful in the profession they choose and are hard workers. They are good listeners and give good advice. They are ruled by the planet Venus so sex is very important to them. Sexually they might not be the freakiest but they bring passion to their game.

Bad Points: Gay Virgo men have a tendency to be overly critical of friends and lovers. “You are wearing that sweater? That shit went out of fashion in 2002!” They can also be fussy and obsessive compulsive. Oh, and that holier-than-thou attitude can be a front. Behind the scenes undeveloped Virgos can be some of the biggest sluts around — they just keep their stuff on the down-low.

Virgo Celebrity: Idris Elba

LIBRA (September 22-October 21)

Good Points: Gay Libra men are great to have as friends. They love to have fun, enjoy hanging out, and are usually the most mellow and balanced folks around. Go to Libras to get advice. They are adept at seeing both sides of an argument. They love good sex and enjoy pleasing their partners. They also bring a lightness and casualness to sex that is welcome — it’s all about having a good time.

Bad Points: Libras can be indecisive and come across as flighty. Because they can see the good and bad in everyone (the symbol of their sign is the scales), Libras can end up staying in bad relationships for too long. And their sensitivity can also be their downfall if they waste it on unscrupulous people who don’t deserve their kindness.

Libra Celebrity: Will Smith

SCORPIO (October 22-November 21)

Good points: Scorpios are analytical and inquisitive people. Want to know how to be successful? Look at how they do it. Scorpios dig in and keep trying and striving, despite the obstacles that life throws. Like the Scorpion they have hard shells. The Zodiac sign lives up to the hype — they really do throw good sex. You want to know how? Scorpios take the time to size you up and get into your head and discover that kink that really turns you on. Or they throw their kink on you!

Bad points: Scorpios tend to live inside their heads, which can make them secretive and hard to understand. You have to earn their friendship, a process some may find too long but is worth it because they are fiercely loyal. Their strong sex drive can also be a detriment because if you don’t please them they are on to the next one. Oh, and never fuck over a Scorpio. They have poison stingers for a reason.

Scorpio Celebrity: Michael Jai White

SAGITTARIUS (November 21-December 21)

Good Points: Gay Sagittarian men make excellent advisers, counselors and teachers. They love to learn and enjoy all life has to experience. Even if they can’t afford it Sagittarians know the best restaurants and clothing stores and can stretch a dollar. Sexually they are playful and robust. Sex to them is a healthy activity like playing sports — so enjoy it!

Bad Points: The Sagittarian’s yearning for new experiences can lead to unfaithfulness. Don’t take this personally, it’s about them, not about you. The wanderlust also makes it difficult for some of them to settle down and be successful in their careers.

Sagittarius Celebrity: Jamie Foxx

CAPRICORN (December 22-January 21)

Good points: Level-headed, kind and sensible, a gay Capricorn man is the one you want in your corner. You will never go broke hanging with a Capricorn — money and security are important to them and they can advise you on how to get ahead in life. They exude class and success. Sexually they may be slow to warm up but once you get them going watch out. Their sign is not symbolized by the randy goat for nothing.

Bad points: Capricorns tend to focus too much on getting ahead and achieving social status in life, which can make them neglectful of their loved ones. It can also make them boring. Capricorns also have a tendency to be angels at home but hide their freaky side from partners. If they learn to not be uptight and let loose every once in a while they are much more fun.

Capricorn Celebrity: LL Cool J

AQUARIUS (January 22-February 21)

Good points: Gay Aquarian men are the hippies of the Zodiac. They are unconventional and march to the beat of their own drum. They are independent, love to work for a good cause, and are very intelligent. They also like having a varied circle of people around them so are rarely boring. Sexually, they are very warm and passionate and even freaky, which comes as a surprise because they at first appear to be laid back and unemotional.

Bad Points: Since they are unemotional it can be hard to form an attachment with a gay Aquarian. They are here one day and gone tomorrow, off to work on some other cause they think is more worthy of their attention. They also tend to be opinionated and stubborn, which doesn’t lend itself to making a good partner.

Aquarius Celebrity: LeVar Burton

PISCES (February 22 to March 21)

Good Points: Sensitive and caring, gay Pisces men can be some of the most pleasant to hang around. They can have an exotic, ethereal air about them, and are known for being easy-going. They are also intensively loyal to their friends, and will be there for you even in some of your darkest moments. Sex is important to Pisceans and is not something they take casually. So you better be on point and about making the experience sensual and rewarding to them if you want them to stick around.

Bad Points: Piscean men tend to be dreamy so can lack ambition and live in a fantasy. They usually do better with a partner who can help them channel their talents in a positive way. And although they are sensitive some Pisceans drift over to the dark side, becoming addicted to drugs or alcohol or becoming serial cheaters. That is why it is important Pisceans always surround themselves with positive people because they tend to adapt the habits of those around them.

Pisces Celebrity: Terrence Howard

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The Negative Minority

Photo courtesy of the Guardian

I’m in a minority group.

Yeah, I know I’m an African American. I’m not talking about that. What I’m talking about is being in the HIV negative minority.

It seems like everybody I meet is HIV positive. And even those who say they are HIV negative still want to fuck raw.

“Oooh, your dick feels good Daddy. Why don’t you slip off that condom and let me feel that skin to skin?”

“Nah, I think I will pass on that.”

I know people who are HIV positive — shit I have dated several. They stay healthy and generally have a positive outlook on life because the virus is no longer a death sentence.

And I’m glad the stigma against people living with HIV has faded, although it has not gone away altogether.

Still, I don’t want to take six pills a day and suffer the side effects of HIV and anti-viral drugs: Lower libido, loss of weight and muscle tone, liver damage, diarrhea, and fat deposits that can build up around the middle, neck and shoulders.

And I don’t understand all these people who fuck raw and don’t care whether they have the virus or not. Shit there are sex parties now specifically for raw sex.

Many of the folks doing this are young and appear healthy…why do that to themselves? I also worry with all this mixing of viral strains are they creating a new HIV virus that will be resistant to the powerful arsenal of drugs we have created.

These young folks don’t remember how awful it was to see friends and family members die from AIDS.

Plus HIV isn’t the only thing out there. Remember syphilis and his kid sister gonorrhea?

But I have to admit sometimes I envy HIV positive dudes. They fuck raw and don’t worry about the consequences, just like we were still living in the 60s and 70s before the AIDS epidemic hit.

Like they don’t have a care in the world.

For more information here is a Centers for Disease Control and Prevention Fact Sheets on AIDS and HIV, the virus that causes the disease.

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The Accidental Escort

Blackmaster, 37, is an escort in Paris. After trying out his trade I think I will keep my day job. Photo courtesy of Gay Escort Club.

I have a new profile on Adam4Adam. The text is short and sweet — not looking for a relationship, just pleasurable encounters.

I don’t list a lot of likes and dislikes – who cares? If someone hits me up and I’m not feeling them I just say, “I’m just an escort using this website to keep in contact with clients.”

That sometimes scares them off. But many times men will ask. “Well, how much are you?”

I make up a number. “$125 an hour.”

And believe it or not some peeps say they will pay.

One day a light-skinned black married man hit me up. He was an educational consultant in the area on business and staying at a hotel at BWI airport about five miles away. He said he would be happy to pay for my time.

From his photos he was not that appealing. Overweight and a grandfather a little over 60 years old. But he offered the money and I thought, “Hey, I’ve always fantasized about being an escort or a porn star. This might be interesting. And if nothing else I can say I tried it out.”

I dressed conservatively in gray wool slacks, burgundy sweater, and a long wool coat. But underneath I had on a pair of sexy, black sheer briefs.

I showed up at the hotel. And he opened the door.

He was 20 pounds heavier than his profile. His legs looked like tree stumps. My stomach flopped but I smiled politely.

What have I gotten myself into? How can escorts do this?

He didn’t see my disappointment. In fact, he was delighted. He asked me to undress in front of him and I did, slowly. His eyes ate me up.

“Very nice. I love a mature man in shape.”

We went to bed and he played with my dick, masturbating me. It only got half hard but he still was pleased with the length of it.

“Wow, I hope I don’t have to fuck him,” I thought.

My freaky angel must have heard my prayer. My “client” really wasn’t into being penetrated and just want to rub against me until he came.

So I lay back with my eyes half closed and thought sexy thoughts. Of lovers past. Of my favorite scenes from porno movies. Of Morgan’s lips kissing the back of my neck.

And my dick got hard and the client grinded and grinded against me, my dick between his legs.

I glanced at the clock on the nightstand. It was 11:25 in the morning and I had been there about 20 minutes. About 40 minutes to go. I can do this. Just keep concentrating.

Fortunately he was a quick cummer. His nutt was watery and slick on my stomach. It was 11:30. A half hour had gone by.

But he didn’t want anything else physical of me. He just wanted to talk.

About being a down-low gay man in a marriage of convenience.

Of how proud he was of his four children’s accomplishments and good marriages. About the joys of grandparenthood.

And about a young, dark Jamaican man he had hooked up with and fallen in love with and the heartbreak he felt when the man dropped him after a few months.

The conversation was actually far better than the sex. But it was time to go. It was time to drop the escort persona and just be Immanuel again.

“My time is up,” I said. I lied about having to prepare for another client that day.

“Oh, sure. I would like to see you again. I come back to the area on business a few times a year.”

“Sure, you have my number. Just send a text.”

My mouth formed those words but I really didn’t want to do it again.

He gave me a crisp $100 bill, a $20 bill and a five. I folded them once and tucked them into my wallet, said goodbye, and left.

When I got home I took the money out and looked at it. It was early Sunday afternoon at the end of winter and very quiet.

“So this is what my sex is worth,” I thought, looking at the bills. It didn’t seem like much at all.

For weeks I didn’t spend the money. I kept it in a drawer. And then one day I wanted to buy something or the other and I remembered I had it.

I spent it much more quickly than it took to earn it.

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The Postman Always Cums Once

Photo courtesy of Cracked.com.

Now that I’m single again I’m discovering hookup technology has changed.

Adam4Adam is passe. Manhunt is a relic. Mobile phones are on the rise and aps like Jackd and Grindr are in.

So I signed up for a Jackd account on my Droid. To be honest it made me feel like something of a relic myself.

Most of the guys on there are young 20-somethings. Ripped abs. No body fat. I mean, I look good for a guy in my 40s but not that good.

So I mostly use it to sit back and observe. But still guys hit me up. A few weeks ago one was very insistent.

“Hey, Pa, I’m right around the corner. I want some of that big dick.”

“Well, I’m not really looking.”

“Look, I just want to suck that dick.”

This dude was just 25 years old. What did we have in common? But it was a cold night and a warm mouth around my dick sounded tempting.

“Okay, come over.”

Less than 10 minutes later he was there. Jackd wasn’t lying. He was just 1.8 miles away.

He was a little more feminine than I liked but when he pulled off his clothes it was all good. Tight, lean body the color of an apricots in caramel sauce. And a blond streak dyed right down the middle of his faux hawk.

I lit a candle, turned off the lights and invited him into my bed. And he jumped on the dick.

But his dick sucking technique left a little to be desired. His lips gripped my dick too softly. His mouth too wet. Boring.

It made me remember why I don’t mess with young boys. Many of them are pretty on the outside but aren’t really that adept at sex.

So I flipped him over and started eating his muscled ass, which looked like two ripe cantaloupes. Wiry, kinky hair covered the crack of his ass and all around his asshole — just the way I like it.

And his ass tasted good too. It had a slight nutty flavor.

“Ooh, Daddy, eat that ass. Shit that fills god.”

I slurped, licked, lapped and nibbled. He was getting more turned on. And frankly so was I.

I know he said he only wanted to suck dick but…

I got up, quickly slipped on a condom, lubed up and thrusted deep. Once. Twice. Three times.

And that was it. “Oooh, nigga I’m cumming.”

His nutt was pearly in the candlelight.

He had to dress quickly and go. Something about picking up his kid sister from cheerleading practice.

“Hey, you really did get over here fast,” I said.

“Dude, I work for the Postal Service. I deliver mail in this neighborhood. I just got off my route.”

And then I really took a good look at him. He was wearing the grayish blue U.S. Postal Service pants and the uniform shirt under his parka.

I looked at his feet. He was wearing those thick-soled shoes postmen wear that look like a cross between boots and high topped tennis shoes.

Damn. I just fucked my mailman.

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The Thug up the Block

I knew “Ray” a few years before I moved to Baltimore. It was a coincidence I ended up moving on the same block.

Ray is a top from who is originally from the Bronx so he has that New York City swagger. All tatted up and shit.

He sometimes likes to play with other tops or tag team a bottom. He is short and a little thick and has a smallish dick that curves up. But he makes up for that in other departments.

Ray can suck dick like Deep Throat, can flick his tongue across nipples as delicately as a cat sipping milk, and is a First Class ass eater.

But he is down-low as hell. The streets of Baltimore are rough and he has lived in the neighborhood for awhile, long before it started gentrifying, and knows all the dudes on the block. He doesn’t want them to know how he gets down — that might deflect from his street cred.

Mind you, I don’t act overtly gay. But if I see Ray on the streets and other folks are around he will nod but not strike up a conversation.

Or if we are standing on the platform waiting for the next light railcar he will walk right past me and stand as far away as possible.

His actions don’t upset me at all — I know the DL game well.Still I think it’s a shame a 40-something man who lives with two pitbulls who would tear you apart without a second thought is so worried about what some teenager selling weed on the corner thinks.

And late at night, when the streets are dark and the old ladies, teenagers, old heads and yuppies are off the street Ray will text.

“Hey, what’s going over there — you got a bottom? You feel like playing?”

“Nah man, I’m going to sleep. Catch you later.”

And I roll over and snore.

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The Substitute

He is a regular. A fuck buddy. The sex you can call or text and an hour later it’s there in your bed, douched and ready to go.

He knows I’m just out of a relationship and not looking for another. Bruised and jaded and still in love with the one before.

“Damn man, I just caught you at the wrong time,” he says minutes after I had fucked him hard missionary style, knifing my dick into his ass while he jacked off and busted a thick, creamy nutt on his brown stomach.

Before Morgan the Substitute might have been a good catch. He is in his early 40s but ran track in college and is still tall and slender as a rail. We both love House music and dancing and dogs and cats.

Plus the substitute could fuck seven days a week and his ass would stay tight — his walls always grip my dick like a glove.

But I know the deal. I’m a foxy motherfucker now. I’m not the green, just-out-the-closet married man I once was. Like a fortune-teller I can look at the tea leaves in the bottom of the cup and read the signs.

The Substitute is a professional and a manager but smokes weed and drinks as soon as he gets off and shuts the door behind him. He shows up, his eyes red and blurry and his speech slightly slurred. He always has to have a beer in his hand. The alcohol and cigarettes are starting to age him — his face is gaunt.

And the alcohol can make his breath smell like a cloud of garbage.

“Hey dude, go in the bathroom and brush your teeth. I got mouthwash too.”

“My breath stinks? No way.”

“Yeah it do,” I say laughing.

I don’t like guys who drink or smoke weed alone. That’s a bad sign. Plus he has two or three regulars he sees, including this 30-something Jamaican buck who wants us all to threesome.

So I don’t take his talk of liking me better than the rest all that seriously.

The Substitute is company to make this new stage in my life less lonely and scratch that itch when I feel it. At least for now while my heart and soul heals and I wait for the sun to shine again.

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Immanuel’s 10-Step Guide for Getting Over Your Dude

I’m actually enjoying being alone again. I found this photo online and it captures how I feel — looking into a future uncertain with confidence.

My move to Baltimore has not brought Morgan and I closer.

In fact, being apart has given me time to analyze the situation better. I hope to always be friends but I have come to realize things had gotten too one-sided and he has deep-seated issues that are not going to change.So last weekend we had an argument over the phone and a testy text message exchange and it’s over just two months shy of our two-year anniversary. And you know, to be honest, I feel pretty good.

It was a good ride and eventually I hope we will be friends but for the next couple of weeks things will be tense. And I will always love that red negro. But I need to be me and be in a more balanced, fulfilling relationship.

There was some sadness but I have been using my 10-Step Plan to get over a relationship. Here what I’ve been doing:

Write a list of things you liked and hated about your ex. If the negatives outnumber the positives, breaking up was the right thing to do. Morgan’s score: 21 negatives versus 10 positives. Yeah, there was a problem there.
Talk about your break-up with close friends. They will put things in perspective. In fact, I have found out some disturbing things my friends knew about Morgan’s past that they didn’t tell me while we dated.
Work on your spiritual side. Dating Morgan I neglected going to church. I am visiting some now and hope to pick a new one soon.
Make a list of lessons you learned from the relationship — what you think you did wrong and right. Apply it to the next relationship.
Go to museums, sporting events and other activities. Staying busy is a good. So far I am hitting museums, book signing parties and regularly explore Baltimore neighborhoods with a college buddy who walks for exercise.
Have a dinner party and have your friends over, especially ones you haven’t seen in a while. Talk about the ex for five minutes and then go on to other subjects. You don’t want to be a wet blanket.
Start a new hobby. I am doing family history research and plan to launch a new blog about my ancestors.
Volunteer. A church I am visiting is having a homeless feeding next month and I plan to be there.
Exercise. I found a new gym and I am trying to increase my visits.
Have lots of guilt-free, no strings, hot, sweaty, passionate sex. I got this covered already. I may blog about it too!

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Mercury Retrograde

Photo courtesy of The Old Farmer’s Almanac.

I am a Gemini. And the planet Mercury rules Gemini.

And Mercury was in retrograde from Election Day to Nov. 26. When Mercury is retrograde it appears to move backward in the morning and evening skies instead of going forward.

Retrograde periods, which happen three or four times a year, can be bad for Geminis. We are usually superb communicators but that gets fouled up when Mercury goes retrograde. We lose things. Make mistakes with money. Things we plan to do get delayed or spoiled.

It’s a time we Geminis need to lay low and keep our mouths shut. It’s a time when God tries to teach us something and we should release old hurts and disappointments and start with a clean slate.

I almost broke up with Morgan during this time.

I won’t go into the details but we had been at each other’s throats. He was getting on my nerves and I know I was jumping up and down and stomping on his.

I bought an investment property in Baltimore in mid November. I was supposed to settle Halloween Day but things got tied up and Hurricane Sandy arrived and the deal sat for weeks. I was not surprised — delays like that happen to Geminis when Mercury moves backward in the sky.

I was so frustrated with Morgan one day that I said, “Look, I will just move to Baltimore and commute to D.C. to work.”

“I knew you were buying that house to leave me,” he said.

I glance up and really look at him, maybe for the first time in weeks. How can a man look so angry but pitiful at the same time. My heart melts a little. What am I about to do?

“Look Morgan Mercury is in retrograde until Nov. 26. This is not a good time to communicate. Let’s wait and think awhile and talk again.”

Nov. 26 came and went. The frustration and restlessness I had been feeling eased, if just a bit.

“Look, Immanuel, I don’t want to lose you,” Morgan says one day. “You are a good man. It took me long time to find you and there is nothing else out there.”

I really didn’t want to lose Morgan either. He has his ways but deep down inside I know he has my back. He is as solid as a rock.

So we make a deal. I need my own spot to decorate how I want. To plant a garden. To have a place for my kids to come. To have some apart time.

And we will split time between his place in D.C. and my place in Baltimore.

The deal satisfies me. I exhale and start breathing deeply again.

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Office Wife

Photo courtesy of hellobeautiful.com.

We go out to lunch together almost every day and make sure to stop by each other’s cubicles to chat.

She compliments me on my still slim physique and my stylish way of dressing.

And I have to admit she is hot.

Half Puerto Rican. Half Dominican.

She is Africa meets the New World. Skin the color of coffee and cream. Womanly hips. Meat on her bones, but not too much.

Yeah, you know she knows how to make a mean pot of beans and rice. And I bet her kisses are sweet as dulce de leche.

My co-worker is divorced with three kids and I have teenagers too so we have a lot to talk about. Our exes and our crazy teen kids.

“You need to take me to your class reunion with you,” she says half jokingly but I know she would dance with me all night if she could.

“You know how to salsa? You gotta teach me that dance,” I say to her.

I know we will never hang out after work. I am gay and have a man at home. I am not out at work.

But sometimes I look at her and wonder what if?

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CONFESSIONS OF A DOWN-LOW BROTHER: THE SEQUEL

The continuing adventures of Immanuel